Happy Valentine's day month to you! In honor of the glorious month, I thought we host a very special guest who knows about as much about the sordid goings on in history as I do! And in honor of her post, we will be giving away 3 digital copies of her Victorian historical romance, THE DARK LADY. Please read her post and leave a comment about the post with your email address for your chance to win! Winners will be chosen and contacted on Feb. 28th.
Without further ado, I give thee Máire Claremont.
Much love,
Delilah Marvelle
It’s so exciting to be on Delilah’s Blog. I have so much
admiration for her work on exposing sex in history. Now, two of my very
favorite subjects in Victorian sex are Hysteria and. . . Well, wait I will keep
the other one a secret for a moment. Delilah has already done the most
MARVELOUS blog on Hysteria. You must read it. But the topic does suggest that
there was a huge divide in psychology and female sexuality at the time.
The Hysteria issue allowed women to be “stimulated” through the
clitoris to give them medical help to ease their anxiety and tension. . .
though it wasn’t considered sexual.
My topic however deals with one of the big thinkers of the time.
A mover. A shaker. Someone still mentioned in the hallowed halls of psychology
today. Sigmund Freud.
Okay, kids. Are you ready for it? Let’s talk about the immature
and mature orgasm. Wooo. Freud firmly believed that women who experienced
orgasms through the clitoris were experiencing immature and infantile sexual
pleasure. A mature woman experienced orgasm through penetration and penetration
alone. Yes. You read right. Your fella just had to stick it in and if you were
a mature woman? Oh, bliss. If not? You were riddled with problems and still a
little girl. Right. . .
So, Freud firmly proposed that as a woman matured her ability to
orgasm transferred from the clitoris to the vaginal canal. And get this, any
woman who persisted in experience orgasm through the clitoris was suffering
from. . . Wait for it. . . Penis envy. Yep. Penis envy. Because she insisted on
experiencing pleasure from her EXTERNAL sex organ, she was envious of the man’s
sexual organ, the penis. After all, she was supposed to relish the passivity of
her INTERNAL organ being penetrated. Women are supposed to be passive, or
didn’t you know? {pardon while I die laughing}
But truly, this was a very serious thing in the medical and
psychological field of the day. A woman who needed clitoral stimulation was
suffering from a mental illness. She was immature, infantile, in need of
serious help and psycho analysis. Today, we find this laughable. Then,
countless women were bereft and at the whim of a budding medical field that
dealt with supposition rather than fact.
Can you imagine living in this world?
A woman would be considered mentally at risk by preferring clitoral stimulation. And that preference would get her in some serious trouble or at least gain her months of analysis. You have to wonder how many women just started faking it so they could cease therapy. Many, I should think. I would. I mean, who really wants a man telling you about your body and how you SHOULD respond to foreplay. . . Oh, wait, I’m sorry. I mean the lack there of.
And consider the man’s mentality. This idea completely freed him
from the need to pleasure his wife/woman in any other way but penetration
because to do so would be bad for her.
Yes. Bad for her. And not only that, it meant something was WRONG
with her. Under Freud’s theory, he’d be encouraging her mental illness and
malformed development by performing oral sex or any other sort of fun stuff.
Men already struggled {struggle?} to understand the clitoris. Freud basically
gave them a get out of jail pass. She can’t come from penetration? She’s
mentally ill. Oi.
Ironically, variations of this theory persisted for a hundred
years. Sure, Freud’s mommy and daddy complexes give food for a lot of thought
and some of it immensely valid, but I don’t think I shall ever forgive him for
so disparaging that glorious organ, capable of reaching climax again, and
again, and again, the clitoris.
Poor Victorian women. Between Hysteria and Freud, what a mess it
was. I thank goodness I live in an era where the clitoris is hailed. Thoughts? Questions? Bring it on for your chance to win a copy of my book, The Dark Lady!
Máire I have heard the term penis envy and even knew it had its roots from Freud but I didn't know the details until now. Thanks for a fantastic article. I guess I will have to remain an immature female LOL! Carin
ReplyDeletemawmom at gmail dot com
I'll just take my mental illness and go home now. It's just amazing to me that we've come as far as we have (ha, I said "come") with men thinking the way they do (or don't). Thanks for sharing!!
ReplyDeletebessgilmartin at groggspot dot com
Leave it to a man...
ReplyDeleteto be lazy AND
make it a woman's fault ;-)
I'm very glad that we're living in a more enlightened age! At least in the bedroom department!
ReplyDeletecerianh at rocketmail dot com
I think that men came up with these ideas just because they did not want to (or just plain could not) satisfy women. Should we all go into therapy together? Maybe we can get a discount, lol.
ReplyDeleteJune
manning_J2004 at yahoo dot com
Guess Freud may have been a big thinker but not a great lover!
ReplyDeletethumbelinda03@yahoo.com
Yet another reason I've never loved the Victorian era. Great post! ella at ellaquinn dot net
ReplyDeleteHi Delilah!
ReplyDeleteObviously today their are some men who make the same mistake as poor deluded Sigmund Freud made so many years ago included my husband.
Somehow what he knew to do when we were married 49 years ago has been now forgotten and what needs stimulation to occur over time is now to be completed instantly with no additional work on his part.
How can a man forget such an important part of pleasure for a woman no matter their age? I often wonder if it's also a problem for the younger generations that came after us with the "instant" pleasure received from tweeter and twits as well as computers. The age of taking time for things to happen now are expected to be instantly.
I'm sure that Dr, Freud would be suggesting to him to lock me away or send me for psycho analysis by now and/or had be locked up as insane! Heaven forbid that a man take responsibility for not being trilled by a wam, bam, thank you Ma'am moment!
Sorry - I forgot to leave y email on above!
ReplyDeletejeannemiro(at)yahoo(dot)com
Great post! I never knew the history behind the term penis envy. The ideas with regards to women's bodies over time are interesting to read about.
ReplyDeletecynypr-books at yahoo dot com
Interesting post.
ReplyDeletebn100candg(at)hotmail(dot)com
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteAh, Siggy, Siggy, Siggy.
ReplyDeleteYou were so glamours in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.
lindamercuryromance at gmail dot com. :)
I'd be hysterical AND mentally ill if I lived in the Victorian era. Thanks for the post!
ReplyDeleteart.from.trash at gmail.com
:)
this good in reading i will like have an experiment
ReplyDeleteHey all!!! Thank you so much for all the fabulous replies!! I have been having trouble replying. But am so excited by the response. Its pretty intense, those crazy Victorians!
ReplyDeleteLove,
Máire
Wow I had no idea that Freud was that an a*hole! This post was very funny, but in a bad way... I can't imagine living then and going through this.
ReplyDeleteThanks for writing it.
alinutza4u2004[at]yahoo[dot]co[dot]uk
Thanks for the blog post and congrats on your new book.
ReplyDeletepenfield716(AT)yahoo(DOT)com
Interesting post. I think Dr. Freud was likely giving voice to many men who wanted to have a good time for themselves - self-centered and selfish. To love and care for someone is work. Why have to expend the effort once you have married and have what you want. By structuring things the way Freud did, he was making life easy for men and releasing them from responsibility. If a woman expected or wanted more from the relationship, she was sick. You have some excellent comments to this post. Best of luck with the release of THE DARK LADY.
ReplyDeletelibrarypat AT comcast DOT net
When I look back to the education I received in Physiology and Sex Ed this Dr. Freudian theory was never mentioned. I am happy, very happy ;), but I don't envy the times we live in.
ReplyDeleteIt is better to be ignorant in knowledge then blind to knowledge.
Having saying that, Thank You for your blogs, books and for sharing the knowledge you have gained on this pictacular topic.
Dani
Poor Freud........if he only knew!
ReplyDeleteAharrison9904@gmail.com
Thank you to all that commented!!! Congrats to our three winners, Aly, LibraryPat and Cerian! You will be contacted in the next few days with details about how to collect your digital download of THE DARK LADY! Much love to you all,
ReplyDeleteDelilah
Well ladies, it looks like Cerian already won a copy of THE DARK LADY on another blog, so we have to pick a new winner! Random names into hat and the winner is....Linda Mercury! Congrats! I'll be contacting you with more info shortly!
ReplyDeleteHell of blog! Love it.
ReplyDeleteHats off to you!